Thread: Canadian slants
View Single Post
  #893  
Unread 27 Jan 2018, 02:31 PM
yon Beast yon Beast is offline
Keep Calm Chive On
 
Join Date: Mar 2007
Location: Saskatchatoon
Posts: 3,963
Default

Simple home remedies

1. Avoid cutting yourself when slicing vegetables by getting someone else to hold the vegetables while you Chop.
2. Avoid arguments with the females about lifting the toilet seat by using the sink.
3. For high blood pressure sufferers ~ simply cut yourself and bleed for a few minutes, thus reducing the pressure on your veins. Remember to use a timer.
4. A mouse trap placed on top of your alarm clock will prevent you from rolling over and going back to sleep after you hit the snooze button.
5. If you have a bad cough, take a large dose of laxatives. Then you'll be afraid to cough.
6. You need only two tools in life - wd-40 and duct tape. If it doesn't move and should, use the wd-40. If it shouldn't move and does, use the duct tape.
7. If you can't fix it with a hammer, you've got an electrical problem.


Some additional advice: Never, under any circumstances, take a laxative and sleeping pills on the same night
__________________
bestest site...
"He who joyfully marches to music rank and file, has already earned my contempt. He has been given a large brain by mistake, since for him the spinal cord would surely suffice. This disgrace to civilization should be done away with at once. Heroism at command, how violently I hate all this, how despicable and ignoble war is; I would rather be torn to shreds than be a part of so base an action. It is my conviction that killing under the cloak of war is nothing but an act of murder." (Albert Einstein)
 
Jockstocks Forums Database Error
Database Error Database error
The Jockstocks Forums database has encountered a problem.

Please try the following:
  • Load the page again by clicking the Refresh button in your web browser.
  • Open the forums.jockstocks.com home page, then try to open another page.
  • Click the Back button to try another link.
The forums.jockstocks.com forum technical staff have been notified of the error, though you may contact them if the problem persists.
 
We apologise for any inconvenience.